This is what i keep telling myself...
I have been stuck inside this "box" and can't seem to get out. You know, the whole 4-sided way of life...home, kids, work, & me. And, not necessarily in that order, but the "me" side always seems to come in 4th...a very distant 4th! Not that I should complain...I know there are many in a much stronger or more difficult "box" than mine.
Home...I can't seem to stay on top of the house. I'm sure a lot of that has to do with the fact that I have absolutely NO motivation to keep the house clean. There are clean sheets and towels in a pile on the guest bed that have been there for weeks. (Not that there is any hurry to get the room clean, as it looks as though it will be quite a while before that bed needs to be used.) The kids' playrooms (yes, that would be multiple playrooms) look like a bomb went off...I tried to blame it on the recent tropical storm that rolled through town, but had to remind myself the storm was OUTSIDE and not in my house! Although, you wouldn't know it by looking at my house!
And "Home" is not just about the condition of the house. My poor hubby has been just as neglected as the house. The poor guy has to deal with the stresses of an unstable work environment, bills, lack of funds to pay those bills, late rent checks every month, bills, a basket case for a wife, bills, car issues, and the list goes on. Oh, by the way, did I mention bills??? Anyhoo, in addition to keeping us safe, clothed, fed, and with a roof over our heads, he has to keep up with my ever-changing moods. He is so patient not to press or ask a ton of questions...he just lets me stay in my own little world. And, I know that despite the neglect, he will be there with open arms whenever I reach out to him for any kind of help or release.
Kids...Holy crap, where to begin on that subject! Sean is gonna be 9 in January, and Austin is gonna be 6. BUT...(now you didn't really think I'd get through a post without the "but") It seems as though we have a 20 year old and a 1 year old. Those kids are so much alike but SO completely different at the same time. I don't get it, and believe me I try to understand those two. Austin seems to be maturing at a negative rate, while Sean seems to be maturing double-time. I swear the boy (yes, the youngest) will never grow up. He's gonna be one of those 30-something guys that still lives at home! And Sean scares me with his ability to master anything gaming or computer related. I don't get how 2 kids can be so brilliant (and I do mean BRILLIANT), yet so dumb at the same time. Do I expect too much of the guys? Who the heck knows...But I still maintain they must speak a different language than I do, because when I speak it seems to either go unheard or misunderstood due to language barriers??? I suppose I should take the optimistic outlook and assume I am raising 2 future rocket scientists or perhaps the next "Bill Gates"...
Work...Man, that is an entirely separate blog post in itself. This has most definitely been a very bizarre year. And it is only November! I know I have been lacking in the blogging department, but I will produce something very shortly regarding this 3rd side of my "box".
Me...What the heck is that?? Who the heck am I??? I am still at a total loss. I love my life (most of the time), so it is very hard for me to understand why I am in the mental, emotional, and physical state I am in... I consider myself EXTREMELY lucky to have the life I have...a great husband, a nice house, 2 beautiful kids, a job, and good health...who could ask for anything more, right? Than why do I constantly feel as though I am missing something? I have definitely had my share of the "hard knock life" ( a little Shirley Temple reference for those of you who didn't pick up on it...and not the little drink with a cherry on top!), but I feel as though I have managed to overcome and emerge a stronger woman as a result. Yet, I feel very weak at times...sometimes like a total failure. Perhaps the problem is not with the other 3 sides of this "box"...perhaps the real problem is that I expect way too much of myself??
Once again, I started typing with a purpose and a message...and once again, I find myself completely derailed and at a complete loss. I honestly have no freakin' clue why I started this post. I can say, with all honesty, that I do feel a bit better just getting it out in the open. So, while this was not my most clever or humorous post, I'd like to thank those of you who stuck with it...I guess the brainiacs at AA are right. The first step really is admitting you have a problem!
But (see, there it is yet again!), maybe the reason behind all this can be blamed on menopause or some sort of woman's mid-life crisis? Not that I am going through menopause, but it would be nice to blame the moods on something! Is 36 too young to be pre-menopausal?? I'm not quite 36 yet, but a fast-approaching b-day will change that...and could be causing some sort of mid-life crisis. Do women even have those?
Again, I feel as though I have no right to complain about anything! After all, I have friends facing layoffs, divorce, death, illness, and so many things much worse than what I am dealing with...
And, it goes without saying (for those of you who know me, anyway) that the title of this post is making me crave Taco Bell in a major way!!!
Friday, November 13, 2009
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Halloween or Halloweenie???
So, I am having this massive internal debate about the upcoming Halloween holiday. Hang tight for a few while I give a bit of background on this particular musing...
Each year, I decorate the front porch for Halloween. And, I go ALL out! I'm talking black lights, glow-in-the-dark spiderwebs, skeletons, bones, tombstones, ghosts, & even a "Scream" dude sitting in the corner. I also have a strobe light flashing inside the house and a fog machine outside. I am known in our current neighborhood (and the last 2 neighborhoods we've lived in) for my Halloween displays. I am typically out with the kids, but the hubby has reported many instances of kids refusing to come up on the porch. Instead they beg their parents to ring the bell to collect the candy. BTW, I usually have GOOD candy...none of that chewy, hard, boring stuff. I go for the Snickers, Reese's, Hershey's, etc. I can't help it...I have an addiction! If I'm gonna have leftover candy, I want it to be good sh*t...not the nasty, leftover from last Halloween sh*t a lot of people hand out...
BUT...(ya know, it's been a while since I had a "but" in a post)...Anyhoo, once again I seem to be venturing off track. Big shock, I know ;)
To add to the front porch display, I am a little over-the-top about the kids' costumes. If I cannot send them out in something that is the "best" or extremely unique, I get a little concerned. For example, last year they went as Mario and Luigi...I made the costumes (even to the point of using dye to get the right color), and the boys looked awesome!
So, this year, they want to be rapper/gangsta/rock star kinda-lookin' "dudes"...Originally, the eldest wanted to be "Batman", and the youngest wanted to be a "Policeman". (Of course, I am thinking, "Where the heck did you ever see Batman???") Needless to say, I was a bit surprised...I thought for sure they would say they wanted to be "Spongebob and Patrick" or "Tom & Jerry", since those are their 2 most favorite shows. A week later, they inform me of this whole rapper/gangsta/rock star change. What??? Who the heck have they been talking to??? How in the world do you go from "Batman" or "policeman" to the whole rapper/gangsta/rocker thing??? Maybe they are just trying to "represent" in our neighborhood? I know, I know...maybe not the most PC thing I have ever put into print, but it is the truth and oh, so accurate...
Once again, I am venturing off on some weird side road...
Back to my original reason for writing (typing??) tonight...
Every year, the kids start to P&M ( that would be piss and moan, for those of you who don't know me) about the whole trick-or-treat thing. Seriously, after about 4 houses, they are whining and wanting to go back home. Now, to their defense, about 1 of every 4 houses in our neighborhood actually answer the door on Halloween, so I can easily see how they get bored/discouraged/tired quickly. Add the whole "hit or miss" thing to the fact that our 'hood is very hilly, and I can see how they'd get tired quick. BUT...(I know, there it is again...) they love, love, LOVE the candy!! Gee...I wonder where they get that addiction??? ;)
SOOOOO...thank you for hanging around this long, considering the fact I have yet to ask the million dollar question of the day...
This year, I had the brilliant idea to "skip" Halloween. Before you all fall on the floor in shock, let me explain. We typically spend way too much on Halloween when you add in costumes (even if homemade) and candy...plus whatever new thing I add to the front porch. This year we are not quite in a position to continue with tradition. I have all the stuff to decorate, but that means we have to have the candy to back it up. This is something I am not sure we are in a position to do...
I came up with the idea to take what I would have spent on costumes and candy and put it into something lasting. I want to give the kids a choice: "I can buy you a costume and we'll trick-or-treat like every year....OR, I can take the same $$, and we'll go to the store for you to pick whatever you want for that same amount."
My question is this: I am a bad Mom for even suggesting such a bizarre idea??
Each year, I decorate the front porch for Halloween. And, I go ALL out! I'm talking black lights, glow-in-the-dark spiderwebs, skeletons, bones, tombstones, ghosts, & even a "Scream" dude sitting in the corner. I also have a strobe light flashing inside the house and a fog machine outside. I am known in our current neighborhood (and the last 2 neighborhoods we've lived in) for my Halloween displays. I am typically out with the kids, but the hubby has reported many instances of kids refusing to come up on the porch. Instead they beg their parents to ring the bell to collect the candy. BTW, I usually have GOOD candy...none of that chewy, hard, boring stuff. I go for the Snickers, Reese's, Hershey's, etc. I can't help it...I have an addiction! If I'm gonna have leftover candy, I want it to be good sh*t...not the nasty, leftover from last Halloween sh*t a lot of people hand out...
BUT...(ya know, it's been a while since I had a "but" in a post)...Anyhoo, once again I seem to be venturing off track. Big shock, I know ;)
To add to the front porch display, I am a little over-the-top about the kids' costumes. If I cannot send them out in something that is the "best" or extremely unique, I get a little concerned. For example, last year they went as Mario and Luigi...I made the costumes (even to the point of using dye to get the right color), and the boys looked awesome!
So, this year, they want to be rapper/gangsta/rock star kinda-lookin' "dudes"...Originally, the eldest wanted to be "Batman", and the youngest wanted to be a "Policeman". (Of course, I am thinking, "Where the heck did you ever see Batman???") Needless to say, I was a bit surprised...I thought for sure they would say they wanted to be "Spongebob and Patrick" or "Tom & Jerry", since those are their 2 most favorite shows. A week later, they inform me of this whole rapper/gangsta/rock star change. What??? Who the heck have they been talking to??? How in the world do you go from "Batman" or "policeman" to the whole rapper/gangsta/rocker thing??? Maybe they are just trying to "represent" in our neighborhood? I know, I know...maybe not the most PC thing I have ever put into print, but it is the truth and oh, so accurate...
Once again, I am venturing off on some weird side road...
Back to my original reason for writing (typing??) tonight...
Every year, the kids start to P&M ( that would be piss and moan, for those of you who don't know me) about the whole trick-or-treat thing. Seriously, after about 4 houses, they are whining and wanting to go back home. Now, to their defense, about 1 of every 4 houses in our neighborhood actually answer the door on Halloween, so I can easily see how they get bored/discouraged/tired quickly. Add the whole "hit or miss" thing to the fact that our 'hood is very hilly, and I can see how they'd get tired quick. BUT...(I know, there it is again...) they love, love, LOVE the candy!! Gee...I wonder where they get that addiction??? ;)
SOOOOO...thank you for hanging around this long, considering the fact I have yet to ask the million dollar question of the day...
This year, I had the brilliant idea to "skip" Halloween. Before you all fall on the floor in shock, let me explain. We typically spend way too much on Halloween when you add in costumes (even if homemade) and candy...plus whatever new thing I add to the front porch. This year we are not quite in a position to continue with tradition. I have all the stuff to decorate, but that means we have to have the candy to back it up. This is something I am not sure we are in a position to do...
I came up with the idea to take what I would have spent on costumes and candy and put it into something lasting. I want to give the kids a choice: "I can buy you a costume and we'll trick-or-treat like every year....OR, I can take the same $$, and we'll go to the store for you to pick whatever you want for that same amount."
My question is this: I am a bad Mom for even suggesting such a bizarre idea??
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I've been working on the railroad...
Not really, but I have been working on building knowledge in 10 little 3-year old minds! It has been a long while since my last post, and so many things have happened since I last wrote. I have yet to write about my trip to Cape Cod, and that was almost a month ago. OMG! A month??? Where did the time go...
Between acts of my Mother, Mother Nature, and the Mother of all sinus infections, I haven't worked a full week in 4 weeks! I guess one can never have too many Mother's in their lives, huh?? Confused yet??? I assure you, I can explain...
I went to Cape Cod with my Mother for 4 days in mid-September, and I missed 2 days of work which resulted in a 3-day work week for me. I'll post on the trip another time... Mother Nature was kind enough to replenish the water supply in the greater Atlanta and North Georgia area, ending a long drought. Doesn't sound so bad, right? Well, not only did she refill the lakes, rivers, ponds, streams, etc., but she also filled streets, homes, businesses, etc. with rainfall totalling over 22" in just a couple days. This,too, resulted in a 3-day work week, as schools were closed for 2 days. The following week (week #3), I missed 2 days of work with the Mother of all sinus infections. I had what the Doc called a bacterial sinus infection. (As opposed to what? Aren't most - if not all - infections caused by some sort of bacteria?? And, I didn't even have to go to med-school to figure that one out. Oh well...) Anyhoo, I ran fever and just felt like total crap for 2 days, again resulting in a 3-day work week.
By this time, I think my kids at school were probably forgetting what I looked like...I know they forgot the class rules, routines, etc.
On to the next week (this would be week #4), which happens to be the current week. The local school system is blessing us with a 4-day weekend! Not sure what the occasion is, but I will certainly not argue with the time off! The "teacher furloughs" as the teacher of my youngest calls this break, will result in back-to-back 4-day work weeks! When all is said and done, I will go a total of 5 weeks in a row without working a full week. Gonna be rough when things go back to normal!!
In the midst of all these bizarre work weeks, I have also taken on a 3rd child! Not literally, OF COURSE (for those of you who know me, this is kind of stating the obvious!), but I am watching a 2-year old little girl after school 3 days a week. She is a student at my school, and one of the cutest little girls I have ever had the pleasure to know. She is your typical, laughter and smile inducing 2-year old. She is also very particular in the way she likes things at naptime. I suppose some of her actions stem from the way her first visit to our house went, but I also have been told from a pretty reliable source that this is normal behavior for this child. So, here's a brief rundown of the pre-nap preparations:
"Can we play for just 5 minutes?"
ME: Okay, but only 5 minutes, and then you need to go lay down.
(5 minutes goes by...) "I just wanna play for 5 more minutes, okay?"
ME: No, we need to go upstairs and get ready for nap. I'll put the Teletubbies on for you for 5 minutes.
"Okay...Where's the books?"
ME: They are already upstairs.
"Where's the cards and Tigger?"
ME: They are still upstairs from last time you were here.
"Heeeeyyyyy, what's that?"
ME: No more toys, it's time to go upstairs.
"Okay. I do it by myself" (Meaning she wants to carry whatever new objects she has collected up the stairs by herself)
So, we get up the stairs and put all the necessary items into the bed in all of their designated places...And after about 10 minutes of discussing where everything is and where I should lay to read a book, I finally get her to close her eyes and go to sleep. The entire process takes anywhere from 30-40 minutes. Now, here's the good part...below is a list of the items that go to bed with this child, who I have renamed "Hector the Collector" (after a Shel Silverstein poem):
Anyway, I am quite sure I am on the verge of losing my mind...I say this because I spend 5 days a week with a roomful of 3-year old children. Then, I come home to my own insanely wild boys. And I voluntarily take on a 2-year old??? What the heck am I thinking...
I can answer that one, too. I love the kids!! Each of my students holds a special place in my heart and mind, and this newest addition to my life has taken a very strong hold! I am honored to be given the opportunity to help shape the lives of our future doctors, lawyers, politicians, teachers, etc. I can only hope they will someday realize they were just as important to my life as I was to theirs!
Between acts of my Mother, Mother Nature, and the Mother of all sinus infections, I haven't worked a full week in 4 weeks! I guess one can never have too many Mother's in their lives, huh?? Confused yet??? I assure you, I can explain...
I went to Cape Cod with my Mother for 4 days in mid-September, and I missed 2 days of work which resulted in a 3-day work week for me. I'll post on the trip another time... Mother Nature was kind enough to replenish the water supply in the greater Atlanta and North Georgia area, ending a long drought. Doesn't sound so bad, right? Well, not only did she refill the lakes, rivers, ponds, streams, etc., but she also filled streets, homes, businesses, etc. with rainfall totalling over 22" in just a couple days. This,too, resulted in a 3-day work week, as schools were closed for 2 days. The following week (week #3), I missed 2 days of work with the Mother of all sinus infections. I had what the Doc called a bacterial sinus infection. (As opposed to what? Aren't most - if not all - infections caused by some sort of bacteria?? And, I didn't even have to go to med-school to figure that one out. Oh well...) Anyhoo, I ran fever and just felt like total crap for 2 days, again resulting in a 3-day work week.
By this time, I think my kids at school were probably forgetting what I looked like...I know they forgot the class rules, routines, etc.
On to the next week (this would be week #4), which happens to be the current week. The local school system is blessing us with a 4-day weekend! Not sure what the occasion is, but I will certainly not argue with the time off! The "teacher furloughs" as the teacher of my youngest calls this break, will result in back-to-back 4-day work weeks! When all is said and done, I will go a total of 5 weeks in a row without working a full week. Gonna be rough when things go back to normal!!
In the midst of all these bizarre work weeks, I have also taken on a 3rd child! Not literally, OF COURSE (for those of you who know me, this is kind of stating the obvious!), but I am watching a 2-year old little girl after school 3 days a week. She is a student at my school, and one of the cutest little girls I have ever had the pleasure to know. She is your typical, laughter and smile inducing 2-year old. She is also very particular in the way she likes things at naptime. I suppose some of her actions stem from the way her first visit to our house went, but I also have been told from a pretty reliable source that this is normal behavior for this child. So, here's a brief rundown of the pre-nap preparations:
"Can we play for just 5 minutes?"
ME: Okay, but only 5 minutes, and then you need to go lay down.
(5 minutes goes by...) "I just wanna play for 5 more minutes, okay?"
ME: No, we need to go upstairs and get ready for nap. I'll put the Teletubbies on for you for 5 minutes.
"Okay...Where's the books?"
ME: They are already upstairs.
"Where's the cards and Tigger?"
ME: They are still upstairs from last time you were here.
"Heeeeyyyyy, what's that?"
ME: No more toys, it's time to go upstairs.
"Okay. I do it by myself" (Meaning she wants to carry whatever new objects she has collected up the stairs by herself)
So, we get up the stairs and put all the necessary items into the bed in all of their designated places...And after about 10 minutes of discussing where everything is and where I should lay to read a book, I finally get her to close her eyes and go to sleep. The entire process takes anywhere from 30-40 minutes. Now, here's the good part...below is a list of the items that go to bed with this child, who I have renamed "Hector the Collector" (after a Shel Silverstein poem):
- A Backyardigans book with little magna-doodle drawing thing attached
- A "Cars" book with the same type of magna-doodle thing attached
- A Thomas book with push-button sounds
- A "How to Tie Your Shoes" book complete with laces
- A handful of Uno cards
- A HUGE stuffed Tigger (about as tall as she is) that talks when you push his tummy
- A toy stethoscope
- And various other items, depending on the day (one day this past week, she took a box of Dora bandaids)
Anyway, I am quite sure I am on the verge of losing my mind...I say this because I spend 5 days a week with a roomful of 3-year old children. Then, I come home to my own insanely wild boys. And I voluntarily take on a 2-year old??? What the heck am I thinking...
I can answer that one, too. I love the kids!! Each of my students holds a special place in my heart and mind, and this newest addition to my life has taken a very strong hold! I am honored to be given the opportunity to help shape the lives of our future doctors, lawyers, politicians, teachers, etc. I can only hope they will someday realize they were just as important to my life as I was to theirs!
Saturday, September 19, 2009
What is it about Texas???
So, I just spent the last several hours watching my beloved Longhorns on ABC's Saturday Night College Showdown, and I must say I have probably aged at least 5 years. Aren't Saturday nights supposed to be relaxing? All week, I have heard more about this Texas / Texas Tech "rematch" than I care to comment about...BUT, I have to admit it definitely lived up to its billing. This game was perhaps more stressful than last year's unfortunate game. I still think the Texas defense should have either committed pass interference or the unsportsmanlike conduct penalties to avoid that freakin TD by Michael Crabtree...
Anyway, that was then, and this is now...and for now I am a happy camper. My Horns are 3-0 (1-0 in conference play). Woohoo...Hook 'Em!!!
You all know I love me some football - college and pro - and you know where to find me on Saturday and Sunday during the greatest season of the year. I love Spring and all those other "traditional" seasons, but my favorite time of year is the stretch between August and February. This is when both the NFL and NCAA Football are in full swing...
So, today, I am watching the Georgia/Tennessee game when Sean asks if he can play the Wii. It was halftime, and I was in the kitchen - out of site of the TV - fixing a snack. So, here's a brief rundown of the conversation:
SEAN: Hi, Mom, how are you?
ME: I'm fine, thanks...how are you?
SEAN: Whatcha doin?
ME: Fixin a snack
SEAN: Ummm, can I play the Wii?
ME: No
SEAN: Why?
(Cuz, ya know when a parent says "no" it doesn't matter...a kid will always ask why...)
ME: No...I'm watching a football game.
SEAN: There's no football on now, and you are in here...
ME: (Still wondering why I am justifying me original "no" response) I'm watching the game
SEAN: Why?
ME: Because I like football.
SEAN: Then why don't you play?
ME: Because grown-up girls do not play football on TV.
SEAN: Then why do you watch?
ME: Because I like it...
Anyhoo...like many other posts, I am not quite sure what I was trying to accomplish by writing, but I did (and still do) find the previous exchange with my son humorous.
Why is that we, as parents, feel the need to explain or justify our every action and decision to our kids??? At what point did society turn the kids into the "Alpha" member of the family??
Anyway, that was then, and this is now...and for now I am a happy camper. My Horns are 3-0 (1-0 in conference play). Woohoo...Hook 'Em!!!
You all know I love me some football - college and pro - and you know where to find me on Saturday and Sunday during the greatest season of the year. I love Spring and all those other "traditional" seasons, but my favorite time of year is the stretch between August and February. This is when both the NFL and NCAA Football are in full swing...
So, today, I am watching the Georgia/Tennessee game when Sean asks if he can play the Wii. It was halftime, and I was in the kitchen - out of site of the TV - fixing a snack. So, here's a brief rundown of the conversation:
SEAN: Hi, Mom, how are you?
ME: I'm fine, thanks...how are you?
SEAN: Whatcha doin?
ME: Fixin a snack
SEAN: Ummm, can I play the Wii?
ME: No
SEAN: Why?
(Cuz, ya know when a parent says "no" it doesn't matter...a kid will always ask why...)
ME: No...I'm watching a football game.
SEAN: There's no football on now, and you are in here...
ME: (Still wondering why I am justifying me original "no" response) I'm watching the game
SEAN: Why?
ME: Because I like football.
SEAN: Then why don't you play?
ME: Because grown-up girls do not play football on TV.
SEAN: Then why do you watch?
ME: Because I like it...
Anyhoo...like many other posts, I am not quite sure what I was trying to accomplish by writing, but I did (and still do) find the previous exchange with my son humorous.
Why is that we, as parents, feel the need to explain or justify our every action and decision to our kids??? At what point did society turn the kids into the "Alpha" member of the family??
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Is a 'Missing Persons" report necessary??
So, I have been feeling (and acting, as I am sure many of you have noticed) a little out of sorts lately. My question is, do I need to file a missing persons report?
Please hang tight as I make an attempt to explain...
I know many of you are moms - some of you are SAHM's, some are working moms, and some of you are like me in that you are home when your kids are, but you do work outside the home as well. Wow, only a few lines into this post, and I am already confused... ;) Anyway, I have been wondering lately, "Where is Erin?" You know, kinda like "Where's Waldo" or "Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?"...But, those are fictional. My issue is quite real, and I suspect it is the question that keeps many of you awake at night.
Or, I could be totally wrong and just a victim of a distorted time/space continuum...
(That last line is a reference to "Back to the Future" for those who did not get it...I am smart, but not that smart! Sorry...I tend to use humor as a coping mechanism... I know, I'm a dork. BUT, if ya can't make fun of yourself, who can you make fun of, right? Actually, you could make fun of a lot of people, you just can't broadcast it the way I just did. Seriously, just go to Wal-Mart on any given day and get an instant ego-boost. It does make me wonder when people stopped putting mirrors in their homes...Hmmm??? Anyhoo, I have managed to venture way off track again, so I will end this particular batch of rambling and continue with the original mission.)
The only way I have been able to describe the aforementioned condition is that "I'm just in a funk." I am quite confident some of you have felt this same way in the not so distant past.
I work outside the home, but I am here to see my kids off to school and to greet them when they get home. Spending the day with 10 children between the ages of 3 and 4 is quite exhausting, but I can honestly say that I look forward to it everyday. Crazy, I know, but it is actually true... Wow, did I just put that in print??? Seriously, I look forward to going to work...I love the social interaction (I am a bit of a "social butterfly"...oh, and I like to talk!), the 10 minute drive that gives me time to myself, the smiles, hugs, and laughs of children when they walk in my room each day...I love to hear, "Hi, Mrs. Erin...I love you." or "Good Morning, Mrs. Erin, I missed you." I love to have a parent tell me they hear nothing but good things from their child about my class. These are the things that get me through the work day...
Even more, I love to hear one of my kids (and I am talking about the 2 that I gave birth to) tell me, "I love you, Mommy. I am so lucky to have such a good family." I love the hugs and kisses in the morning before they get on the bus, and then again after the bus drops them off in the afternoon. I like that they want me there each and every night to put them to bed. I like the feeling that I am going to fall over when one of the boys comes running at me out of nowhere to give me a hug. While I don't like the smell of sweaty, little boys ( kinda reminds me of a wet dog), I love the smiles on their faces when they have had a good day out with Mother Nature.
So...why is it that I feel so disjointed? I am asked, "Who are you? What do you like to do in your free time?" Questions like that really throw me for a loop, because I honestly do not know how to answer. I know what I used to like and who I used to be, but all of those things have changed. My priorities have changed. I know, I know...that's kind of a given when you have kids. BUT, I am curious as to why nobody ever speaks of this change. Did Dr. Spock write about it in a book that I failed to read?? I am often asked, "Are you okay?" Do I really come across as being that far off???
So, to skip a bunch of psycho-babble and Kleenex-inducing thoughts, I will wrap this particular post. I do thank those of you who made it to the end, and I will certainly post a more smile or laughter-inducing tale next time...
I do realize I did not quite express all that I set out to, but it is late and I have much to do...
Okay, not really, but it sounded good as I was writing it (typing?)...
BTW, as far as the whole "Back to the Future" reference...if movie writers can come up with that type of advanced technology, shouldn't the real brains in our country be able to come up with a way to reduce our fuel intake? I mean, seriously...Doc Brown ends up running a vehicle/time machine on banana peels, and we can't figure out a way to run a car without supporting the Middle East??? Hello....
Please hang tight as I make an attempt to explain...
I know many of you are moms - some of you are SAHM's, some are working moms, and some of you are like me in that you are home when your kids are, but you do work outside the home as well. Wow, only a few lines into this post, and I am already confused... ;) Anyway, I have been wondering lately, "Where is Erin?" You know, kinda like "Where's Waldo" or "Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?"...But, those are fictional. My issue is quite real, and I suspect it is the question that keeps many of you awake at night.
Or, I could be totally wrong and just a victim of a distorted time/space continuum...
(That last line is a reference to "Back to the Future" for those who did not get it...I am smart, but not that smart! Sorry...I tend to use humor as a coping mechanism... I know, I'm a dork. BUT, if ya can't make fun of yourself, who can you make fun of, right? Actually, you could make fun of a lot of people, you just can't broadcast it the way I just did. Seriously, just go to Wal-Mart on any given day and get an instant ego-boost. It does make me wonder when people stopped putting mirrors in their homes...Hmmm??? Anyhoo, I have managed to venture way off track again, so I will end this particular batch of rambling and continue with the original mission.)
The only way I have been able to describe the aforementioned condition is that "I'm just in a funk." I am quite confident some of you have felt this same way in the not so distant past.
I work outside the home, but I am here to see my kids off to school and to greet them when they get home. Spending the day with 10 children between the ages of 3 and 4 is quite exhausting, but I can honestly say that I look forward to it everyday. Crazy, I know, but it is actually true... Wow, did I just put that in print??? Seriously, I look forward to going to work...I love the social interaction (I am a bit of a "social butterfly"...oh, and I like to talk!), the 10 minute drive that gives me time to myself, the smiles, hugs, and laughs of children when they walk in my room each day...I love to hear, "Hi, Mrs. Erin...I love you." or "Good Morning, Mrs. Erin, I missed you." I love to have a parent tell me they hear nothing but good things from their child about my class. These are the things that get me through the work day...
Even more, I love to hear one of my kids (and I am talking about the 2 that I gave birth to) tell me, "I love you, Mommy. I am so lucky to have such a good family." I love the hugs and kisses in the morning before they get on the bus, and then again after the bus drops them off in the afternoon. I like that they want me there each and every night to put them to bed. I like the feeling that I am going to fall over when one of the boys comes running at me out of nowhere to give me a hug. While I don't like the smell of sweaty, little boys ( kinda reminds me of a wet dog), I love the smiles on their faces when they have had a good day out with Mother Nature.
So...why is it that I feel so disjointed? I am asked, "Who are you? What do you like to do in your free time?" Questions like that really throw me for a loop, because I honestly do not know how to answer. I know what I used to like and who I used to be, but all of those things have changed. My priorities have changed. I know, I know...that's kind of a given when you have kids. BUT, I am curious as to why nobody ever speaks of this change. Did Dr. Spock write about it in a book that I failed to read?? I am often asked, "Are you okay?" Do I really come across as being that far off???
So, to skip a bunch of psycho-babble and Kleenex-inducing thoughts, I will wrap this particular post. I do thank those of you who made it to the end, and I will certainly post a more smile or laughter-inducing tale next time...
I do realize I did not quite express all that I set out to, but it is late and I have much to do...
Okay, not really, but it sounded good as I was writing it (typing?)...
BTW, as far as the whole "Back to the Future" reference...if movie writers can come up with that type of advanced technology, shouldn't the real brains in our country be able to come up with a way to reduce our fuel intake? I mean, seriously...Doc Brown ends up running a vehicle/time machine on banana peels, and we can't figure out a way to run a car without supporting the Middle East??? Hello....
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Am I a victim of selective hearing or just plain old being ignored??
Do you ever have those moments where you honestly think you MUST speak a different language than your children?? What other explanation is there for the blank stares and ignorance?? I know, most of you are moms, so you of course understand what I am saying.
I am so totally threatening to make a voice recording of myself saying some very key phrases. This way, when I am being ignored, I won't lose my voice trying to get the kids to listen. I can just set the voice recording somewhere centrally located in the house...hmmm, maybe even get some sort of intercom to broadcast the words throughout the house. You know, it would include things like:
I am so totally threatening to make a voice recording of myself saying some very key phrases. This way, when I am being ignored, I won't lose my voice trying to get the kids to listen. I can just set the voice recording somewhere centrally located in the house...hmmm, maybe even get some sort of intercom to broadcast the words throughout the house. You know, it would include things like:
- Stop yelling
- No running
- Quit hitting your brother
- Stop saying butt, poop, fart, wiener, tee-tee, etc. (These would be recorded in individual lines though.)
- Quit playing and eat
- Turn that down
- Stop whining (Gee, I wonder who that one would be targeted at???)
- Stop crying (see above thought...)
- Stop being such a baby (again, targeted at a specific person)
- Brush your teeth
- Get in bed
And so many others, I might have to upgrade the iPod to hold it all! For example, my eldest came home from school today saying, "Hi, I'm Fart Laser." Nice, huh?? Anyway, he said it about 15 times within 2 minutes of being in the house. So, as I sat here saying, "That's nasty, don't say that." and "Stop saying that." and "Seriously, I don't want to hear it anymore.", the child just keeps bouncing around saying it over and over. I must have finally gotten my voice loud enough that he heard me on some level, because he shortened it to, "Hi, I'm F.L.!!" Little s***...I so wanted to smack him!
Then, there are those times the kids will ask you for something and not wait to hear the answer. So, as you are answering the original question, it is asked again. Only this second time it is with much more volume and added emphasis to the "Mom". When I try to explain that I have already answered that very question (usually more than once), I get that blank stare. So, of course I am thinking whatever they have asked for must not be all that important if it has already been forgotten. So, I will double-check to make sure the kid still wants the snack or popsicle or drink or whatever before opening the requested item and handing it over.
Even better, are the times you ask (for example), "What do you want to drink with dinner, lemonade or milk?" Only to be completely ignored as they try to decide what the "reward" is for whoever finishes eating first. BTW, that is another thing I would add to the voice recording, "It's not a race. It doesn't matter who finishes first." Anyway 5 minutes into dinner the whining begins, "Mom, my throat is burning, and I don't have anything to drink." So, I will ask again, "Do you want lemonade or milk?" No answer...(insert the whole crickets chirping sound effect here)... So, a few more minutes pass, "Moooom, I am so thirsty I think I am drying up inside." Oh please!! I thought only girls were supposed to be drama queens.
Anyway, you get the idea, since this goes on almost nightly in probably every household in America. I remember my mother telling people when we were younger that we had "selective hearing". I wonder if it is some sort of birth issue that goes away with age (except in the case of the male population where the problem seems to intensify...LOL). Even as I type this, I am being given the blank stare when I ask my child (for about the 30th time) to quit being nosey and to go away til I am finished.
So before I sign off to go get in his face (where I will be able to see if he is listening or not), I must tell you that I firmly believe this voice recording will become very handy in my classroom, too...
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
What a difference a day makes...
...or a week, as it is in my case!
Last week was my first week back to work, and I was really looking forward to a 3-day work week. As it turns out it was a great week (with 5 very sweet kids), and I have to admit I did sleep most of Monday and Friday! It was so nice to put the kids on the 7:15 bus (yes, that would be AM) and go back to bed!!
Sidebar: That aforementioned 7:15 bus takes the kids a whopping 2 miles!! And the first bell doesn't ring until 8:15...What the heck, man...Why so early???
Anyway, as the title says, "What a difference a day makes...". (Does anybody else remember that song?? Was it from a commercial or something?? Help me out here, people.) So, I got the call yesterday (Monday #2 of the school year...and, yes, I was asleep when the call came!) asking if I still wanted to teach 5 days a week. Well, here's where I was really torn in my response. The additional pay of a 5-day week versus a 3-day week is awesome and, as it happens, very necessary...BUT (sorry, can't have a post without one of those pesky "buts"), I was totally enjoying the whole Mon./Fri. spent in pajamas. (Okay I know, I always run around in my "pajamas"...just a technicality for lack of better words) Last year I taught 5 days and LOVED it, but that was all I knew. This year started as only 3 days, and I will admit that it was kind of cool.
Okay okay, enough of me typing out my internal mental issues regarding the school week and back to the topic at hand...
So as I was saying, "What a difference a day makes...". Today started week #2 of my school year, and I had a room full...and when I say full, I mean FULL...of 3 year old boys and girls. Last week's group more than doubled, and I now find myself responsible for 11 children each day. I couldn't be more thrilled that these parents entrust their children's care, development, early education, etc. to me, but...holy cow...what a complete change! I know I will get used to the larger group, and I have already adjusted my lesson plans for the next couple weeks to allow for the change. (I think it's necessary for the kids and for me too, to have a bit more time getting used to the class, the larger group, the new rules and new routines.) So, here's how my day went:
Last week was my first week back to work, and I was really looking forward to a 3-day work week. As it turns out it was a great week (with 5 very sweet kids), and I have to admit I did sleep most of Monday and Friday! It was so nice to put the kids on the 7:15 bus (yes, that would be AM) and go back to bed!!
Sidebar: That aforementioned 7:15 bus takes the kids a whopping 2 miles!! And the first bell doesn't ring until 8:15...What the heck, man...Why so early???
Anyway, as the title says, "What a difference a day makes...". (Does anybody else remember that song?? Was it from a commercial or something?? Help me out here, people.) So, I got the call yesterday (Monday #2 of the school year...and, yes, I was asleep when the call came!) asking if I still wanted to teach 5 days a week. Well, here's where I was really torn in my response. The additional pay of a 5-day week versus a 3-day week is awesome and, as it happens, very necessary...BUT (sorry, can't have a post without one of those pesky "buts"), I was totally enjoying the whole Mon./Fri. spent in pajamas. (Okay I know, I always run around in my "pajamas"...just a technicality for lack of better words) Last year I taught 5 days and LOVED it, but that was all I knew. This year started as only 3 days, and I will admit that it was kind of cool.
Okay okay, enough of me typing out my internal mental issues regarding the school week and back to the topic at hand...
So as I was saying, "What a difference a day makes...". Today started week #2 of my school year, and I had a room full...and when I say full, I mean FULL...of 3 year old boys and girls. Last week's group more than doubled, and I now find myself responsible for 11 children each day. I couldn't be more thrilled that these parents entrust their children's care, development, early education, etc. to me, but...holy cow...what a complete change! I know I will get used to the larger group, and I have already adjusted my lesson plans for the next couple weeks to allow for the change. (I think it's necessary for the kids and for me too, to have a bit more time getting used to the class, the larger group, the new rules and new routines.) So, here's how my day went:
- My original 5 kids were highly confused as to the sudden influx of extra little bodies.
- The new ones were thrilled to find new toys to play with...and perhaps highly confused as to the sudden change in environment.
- There were 2 children that I was completely in the dark about when/if they were going to start.
- There was one VERY new student who didn't want Mommy & Daddy to leave and made it very clear (very loudly clear) to the whole school.
- My group time (or circle-time, as I call it) started 40 minutes later than I prefer, and many representations of mass chaos occurred during this time.
- The kids all LOVED snack time, and I think it was the only time all day they were all in one place at one time!
- I think I cleaned 48 runny noses, wiped 87 dirty hands and faces, hugged 24 sad/upset/angry/confused/happy/cute/injured kids, and thought, "What the heck was I thinking?" about 942 times...And, this is just the first day of my newly enlarged class size.
So, I won't continue to bore you with the minutia of my day; however, I do have some major gripes on the day...
If you tell me your child is potty trained, please explain to me why they will crap in their underwear within minutes of exiting the bathroom...And, if said child is truly trained, explain why that child feels the need to completely strip down (shorts, underwear, socks and shoes) in an effort to clean themselves, without telling me they need help...And, please explain to me why this same "potty trained" child then proceeds to dump the crap into the toilet, flush the toilet, then "wash" the crappy underwear in the toilet...And, tell me why this same child proceeds to run out of the bathroom into the classroom naked from the waist down and start playing with the toys...
Oh, but the real laughter and shock value didn't come until said child turned around and proudly displayed a trail of toilet paper stuck in the butt-crack...
Oh yes, any of you who have ever spent more than 2 minutes around a young child understand how hard it is to control laughter in front of such impressionable young minds. Well, let me tell ya, this was not one of those moments of contained laughter. It was just so freakin' funny to see a kid running around half naked with a string of TP hanging like some sort of fancy train - you know, like on a wedding dress...
I can honestly say it is a first for me, and I have raised 2 boys through massive potty training issues. I have spent time around many other children in that age group, whether it be family, friends or students. And, I am so thankful the rest of my class was not in sight at the time...Can you imagine??? "Hey, mommy guess what? One of my new friends was playing with toys and had no clothes on...and they forgot to take off the toilet paper." Oh yeah, real nice image to send home, don't ya think???
I could go on and on, but I think that's a great place to end this particular post...
(No pun intended!)
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